If Not You…..Who?

I saw this comment the other day on a coffee cup. I generally dismiss motivational messages, but this one stuck with me. I have engaged in several conversations with people lately concerning what I refer to as generational name tagging. This is were you hang expectational notions or expected responses by people of different generations. Every generation coming of age has been labeled in some form by the one before it. Jen and I have discussed this about the generation name tags our kids fall under, the Gen Xer’s, Zer’s and Millennial’s. Over time we have gotten away from the generations before us that were a reflection of their parents living through the Great Depression. There was never much of a service related industry that was sustainable through them because they pinched a penny hard enough to see the copper squeezed from it and the belief that if they couldn’t do it for themselves, it just didn’t need to be done. As the baby boomers came along the service industry started to flourish. Not because we didn’t know how to do things, we just made enough money that in a way, it just became a status symbol to have people do it for us. But, because we knew how it should be done, we are a major pain in the ass to the service industry because of our scrutiny. Then the next several generations came along and it’s like they just didn’t care to learn. Bear in mind, I realize this isn’t across the board and there is genius left and right in all generational groups. But, I have to say, I get more questions about how to do something by the aforementioned three groups.

My dad’s generation, and before, just did things. Sometimes this meant to fail, and fail over again, until you figured it out. It was a matter of pride and they never wanted to be labeled as a “I can’t do it type person”. In fact, they didn’t want anyone to know they failed several times before success. Somehow, they want you to believe that the knowledge was inherently something they were born with and it just oozes out of them in times of need. I watched and I watched and tried to learn everything I could from them. My generation was less opposed to failure. In fact, it became honorable to say you failed to help others understand it was ok and that the act of trying was what counted and we are also the sad generation that during sports, everyone had to compete. I liked it much better when people just discovered they weren’t good at something and moved on to find what they were. What I also learned was that most things service people did for us was not rocket science, in fact, most of the people that did this work were people, that for the most part, were uneducated. Formal education at least, they certainly have degrees from the School of Hard Knocks. They had apprenticeships and internships, but book learning was not their bag. Ironically, many did learn from a book and had to take state tests for license and to get certified pieces of paper that said they could legally do it and be bonded for insurance too. Funny what we declare as educated, the hierarchy must have been developed by university types to justify the money spent on their education, because that certainly had to have made them smarter, right? I know some plumbers with mansions, so I suspect the ideology is probably a little askew.

As a manager over many younger people and father to five who have brought others into our close order of family, the skill sets have become quite diverse. Getting back to the “if not you…who?” theme, most all of them excel in their fields chosen as careers. In fact, most of them would be considered masters at what they are doing. A couple may still be searching for their path. That’s ok, they are actively moving forward and should get there in due course. All of my kids, and that includes all five, understand that if not them, then who will do it for them. I would say they are all overachievers, but may never get rich, just provide a good solid and well funded lifestyle for their families. Even one of the girls has become the wrench-turner in their household. Her lack of wanting to pay someone money that she can learn herself was simple enough motivation. However, their is nothing wrong with having people do things you could do for yourself, and at this point in my life, I relish the fact that we have been successful enough to have things done that I simply just don’t want to do. Jen says I’m a pain in their ass through the process, but this is just because I know how it should be done and I expect them to do my way. Frankly, I’m paying for it, it should be done my way.

Mostly, I think this phrase brings to mind the same sad problem we have had since welfare was first induced. People that don’t know anything, won’t educate themselves to better their lives, and have an expectation that everyone else has a responsibility to ensure they have a life equal to the one you created by taking the rights steps. They are a scourge on society and their answer to the “If not you?”, well it is simple. The answer is you, not them, you!