Social Media; I’m Not a Fan

How many times have you been stopped at a red light; the light turns green and the car in front of you just sits there? On this trip, it has happened no less than 10 times. You honk your horn; the persons head pops up and they accelerate hoping to make up for their mistake. Or you are driving down the road and see someone either driving very straight in the fast lane 15 mph under the limit or they are weaving all over and speeding. Ten years ago, you would have thought the person was drunk or stoned, but now, more than likely they are on their hand-held personal computer called a smartphone. My personal opinion is that the lawmakers need to make the offenses being violated be equal to that of driving under the influence. That is exactly what it is, they are driving under the influence of social media. That five second high from someone liking a selfie you posted or you are eagerly waiting on that all important thumbs up to your comment. It is a sickness and an addiction and really needs to be taken care of.

I’d really like to blame the millennials and Gen Zer’s, but you can’t and although probably the biggest offenders, people of all ages can’t leave their smartphone alone. I get caught in the trap too and Jen hounds me about touching my phone if driving. But while I’m driving, she has her head buried in her phone. Not sure why, but most of the time she is playing a card game, maybe it’s an effort to ward of the possible onset of some dementia related disease. Most of the time I feel I’m experiencing the sights and sounds of the road by myself and when I see something to point out to her, by the time she lifts her head, we’ve passed it. We watch some TV show that she wants to watch and it’s the same thing, head buried in her phone, but somehow, she still knows what is going on. I feel she is watching the show with her friend iPhone and not me. I’m the irritation in the room that is talking and trying to communicate. From the best I can tell, there is a limit to her multi-tasking and it is only two things at one time and I’m the unmanageable third. I really liked it better when it was the two of us experiencing something and not four plus. Times when we didn’t instantly share experiences instead having that awful dinner party that disguised your slide show of your vacation. I would still take that over the way the world has become. What’s next, an implant in my head that shares my thoughts instantly via my social media sights? That could get most of us in trouble.

I’m not blaming Jen, I’m just as guilty. Babe, I want to watch a football game and then I spend most of the time with my phone in my hand or on my chest when I feel asleep. Only to get pissed off when I wake to her having changed it to a home improvement channel. Doesn’t she know I can absorb the game and not miss a play and that I’m really under a meditative rest fully concentrating on the game? Last night, in fact, we were watching one of my reality crimes shows and I had fallen asleep in the last thirty minutes or so. She told me I didn’t know what was going on anyway and to go to bed, I mumbled under my breath, went and took my shower, and came out and told her what had happened to the two criminals. My phone was bedside and I told her it was because I was absorbing the show, you know through osmosis or something like that. What had really happened was that I had looked up the eventual arrests and trials and already knew who was guilty and what sentence they both had gotten. Sitting here now, why would I have kept watching the show when I knew the outcome already? I’m not sure, but I guess that it is the instance gratification that my smartphone can bring me.

I admire those that either never got caught up in the social media part of the phone, but I would guess they still have a smartphone and rarely get on their computer. I absolutely refuse to search the internet using my computer. I mostly have a computer to write with and take care of my bills. I’ve had to repair too many computers that fell prey to hackers trolling to find out as much information as they can about us and track our every move on the computer. I know this doesn’t stop them from doing the same thing on my phone, but at least my money is not managed on the same device as my surfing and social media participation. It makes me feel safer. After my mom passed, I watched my dad decide he should have a Facebook account, so he set one up. After about a week, I asked him what he thought of it and he said he had already deleted his account. Asking why, he said he instantly started getting emails he didn’t want and friend requests he didn’t need. I laughed not because he just didn’t get the whole social media experience, but because he could actually delete his account. I have wanted to delete mine for years, but when I actually set out to do it, I get this instant anxiety about how am I going to stay up on the lives of those that mean something to me? Then I quickly logoff and go do something else. What I figured I needed to do was to gradually wean myself off it, so I started forgetting my phone when I would go to the store or leave it in the house for the half day I was outside working in the yard. But as soon as I would get back to the house, the first thing I would do is grab my phone to see who might have tried to call me, text me, or like something on Facebook I had posted. I’m telling you it is an addiction and I’m infected. I’ve been weaning myself off it for about four years now.

One of my son-in-law’s makes a good portion of his income via the followers he has. On one hand I’m totally fascinated that someone can make a living from this, but the flip side is worry that something new will come along to replace it and make him obsolete. I remember the Myspace craze and how shortly after I finally opened an account, it seemed to have vanished due to Facebook. Although Facebook has had a longer run, it certainly feels it is becoming less relevant as new sites like Tik-Tok and Instagram are gaining steam. One smart play by those running Facebook is that they have a hand in both mentioned sites. So, Facebook might eventually disappear, but their ownership has already secured the next thing trending large. I hope my son-in-law has the wear-with-all to keep up with the new platforms and to stay relevant to his subscribership, and I am really encouraged by his branching into new lines of business in the entertainment world. He’s a hard worker and runs at 200% in effort, I just hope his stamina keeps him one step ahead. My fear obviously is based on the fact that I have no real clue as to the market he works in and because of my ignorance in it, I worry.

Jen has said more than once that when we are having a family gathering, all phones are going into a basket, only to be retrieved when she decides the event is over. The anxiety of the faces, the sweat beads that will form, will be my amusement, but I will also make sure I’m well out of the way when she releases them to once again join the land of the connected so they can tweet, post, like, comment, and tik-Tok our dinner experience for all to see. That is what life has been reduced to, instant gratification, the endorphin release, and that addiction fix called social media. If I was a social worker or psychologist, I think I would focus my practice on just one thing, social media addiction and I would become rich beyond belief. I’d probably have my own self-help book and I’d develop a course and self-promote it through workshops.  

Although I hate social media, I participate and for the same reasons as everyone else, I want to be liked and appreciated for the life I lead. And if I am too boring, I can spice it up a little with some non-reality via my reality site of choice. I can lead any life I want to lead and make it appear that I’m cooler than I’m capable of being. It’s not a lie, just a little stretch of the truth to make others admire me and want to experience a part of my life whether they really wanted to or not. God help us and please like my post!!